When I was a young girl, a programme was rolled out across the UK for road safety, called the Green Cross Code. It was drummed into us at school with videos, games and practical sessions. The strap line was:
‘Stop, Look, Listen’
I have many memories of crossing roads with my classmates and teacher, having followed the Green Cross Code. I still use it today when crossing a road! I’ve been thinking about this strap line as I re-read Ann Voskamp’s book ‘One Thousand Gifts’ and I’m being challenged to really appreciate life. She exhorts the reader to take time, everyday, to catch their breath and appreciate the gifts that are around them. Through these times of observation, gratitude wells up, leading to peace in the midst of chaos, calm in the storm, hope in the dark.
Do I really do it?
I need to STOP. Even just for a short time, stop. While washing dishes at the kitchen window, while sorting laundry, while making a coffee at work, while travelling throughout the day. It doesn’t necessarily mean disappearing into a room on my own, it may just mean taking a deep breath, looking around and taking 5 minutes to gain perspective.
Then I need to LOOK. Look for the unexpected. The bird on a branch, the ray of sunlight, the child’s smile, the friends around me. There is always something to see, if I will just look.
And LISTEN. Listen for His voice. I can hear it in the wind, laughter, music, silence - it is possible to hear Him in a busy workday or a manic day at home with a full schedule. It really is.
These 3 simple steps open up my heart to Him; they allow thankfulness to rise, they change my perspective and they teach me more about what it is to live step by step with my Maker.
So in the midst of the all the busy-ness, the packed diary, the mundane tasks, let’s all take time to stop, look and listen. Today.
On the 1st of December I fell off my bike whilst cycling home from work. I was
excited to get home that evening because my husband and I were going to put up
our Christmas Tree! But as the front wheel of my bike got caught on the curb of the pavement I was trying to mount, and I went toppling over face first into the concrete all my plans and thoughts instantly changed.
I don’t think I had a slow-motion experience as my bike and I fell over, in fact I don’t really remember what happened at all. Not because I blacked out, but more because I was in complete shock. I just remember pacing around in pain and disbelief of what had just happened. I then realised that I was bleeding from my mouth but I didn’t know what was wrong. I tried holding my gloves up to my mouth to control the blood as another cyclist stopped to see if I was alright. He kindly let me borrow his phone and I was able to call Ben (who had thankfully just arrived home from being in a different city all day!). Through tears I told Ben that I’d fallen off my bike and asked him to come and pick me up. This is going to sound really silly, but I sent the other cyclist away because I started to feel very self-conscious as I didn’t really know the extent of what was wrong with my face and I didn’t know what I looked like! I started to become aware that my lip didn’t feel right but all I could think was that I wanted to get home and wash my face and put a bandage on the cut whatever it was.
A lady runner, who was passing, stopped and insisted on waiting with me. I was very grateful for this even though I felt embarrassed and very emotional still. Finally Ben arrived in the car. He took one look at me and said we should probably go straight to the accident and emergency at the nearest hospital (the place I work incidentally). I started to feel a bit scared because I really didn’t know how bad the injuries were and as the adrenalin was disappearing I was becoming more aware of the pain.
Ben’s mum, Carole, drove us straight to the hospital then waited with us both. A&E was fairly quiet that evening so I didn’t have to wait as long as you might normally have to. Amazingly there was a maxillofacial doctor in the emergency unit that night so I had a specialist who could see me and assess my facial wounds. I had split my lip straight through and by this point it was already very swollen and was still bleeding. The area around my right eye was grazed and had taken quite a hit as I went down. The only other damage was a graze on my hand and bruises on my legs. I won’t go into the gory details but I had to have a local anaesthetic injection in my lip and then 5-6 stitches. I’d never had stitches before or even broken a bone so I did feel nervous about the whole ordeal.
Once the stitches were in and I was cleaned up I was sent off home with instructions that it would take at least a week for the stitches to dissolve and it would take a few weeks before the lip properly healed. Despite finding it difficult to eat, drink, talk or smile the healing is coming along very well and it doesn’t look like there will be much sign of the cut on my lip when it’s fully healed.
Overall the accident could have been so much worse than it was – I didn’t break any bones and the injuries were all fairly temporary. No cars were involved, which could have made it a lot worse, and I was wearing a cycling helmet!
The two days previous to the accident God had really impressed upon me the fact that He holds me in the palm of His hand. We had been preparing for Sunday worship and one of the songs we were going over was ‘With All I Am’ by Reuben Morgan, which has the line in it, ‘You hold my world in the palm of your hand’. As we were singing God really impressed this thought on me afresh and I knew God was speaking this directly to me. The next day I was helping Ben lead a session on hearing the voice of God with some of the young people of the church. We were reading the word and asking God to speak to us through it. As we read Isaiah 40, verse 12 stood out to me:
‘Who else has held the oceans in his hand? Who has measured off the heavens with his fingers? Who else knows the weight of the earth or has weighed the mountains and hills on a scale?’
I felt God again impressing on me that His hand is big enough to contain the whole world and I’m included in that. There’s nothing too big for Him but also there’s nothing too small for Him to notice and care about.
Even though I went through a whole host of emotions at the time of the accident and in the days and weeks following it, I have really known a strong sense of God’s peace like never before. The words that God had spoken to me before the accident brought life in that situation – they were just the words I needed to hear to still the fear and the shock of the situation. As I was sat in the emergency department I almost felt like there was a bubble of protection around me, just stilling me on the inside. I knew then the reality of what God had spoken – that He really was holding me in His hand and that I was safe there.
This summer I was able to attend a women’s conference in Cambridge, UK, all about The Undivided Heart; we heard from a whole host of fantastic speakers but two that really connected for me were a talk by Baroness Cox on ‘The Privilege of Making a Difference’ and a seminar led by Faith Rawley about ‘Soaking in God’s Love’. Baroness Cox had spoken about the particular difficulties faced by the people of Burma, how they had been forced from their homes and villages by the thousands and were now wandering aimlessly; trekking through the jungles and wading through rivers with their few possessions on their backs. They were refugees, fleeing their home countries without a destination to aim for, without hope of finding rest in the near future.
Later in Faith’s seminar, we were encouraged to take time and reflect on God’s Word from Psalm 91:1-4:
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
One word instantly stood out to me: refuge. I began to understand what that really meant, seeing it that day in the context of the Burmese refugees who were walking and walking, without hope or destination. God began to speak to me about what it meant to take my refuge in Him; slowly seeing that is it more than I had ever imagined! Not only should I see my relationship with Him as a place of shelter, protection and safety but knowing God as my refuge means the opposite to being a refugee.
A refugee is someone who is being driven on without any idea true of where they are going; with God as my refuge, I am aiming straight for Him. A refugee lacks hope of ever coming to rest; my hope is rooted in God and his plan for me: “We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure” (Hebrews 6:19).
Instead, we can say to our souls; “Be content.” Just as the Psalmist declared of the Lord in Psalm 46,“[He] is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging” (v1-3).
No matter what the circumstances we are in, whether the world is falling apart around us or it just feels as though it is, “The Lord Almighty is with us; [God] is our fortress” (Psalm 46:7).
This, I believe, is contentment in its truest sense. Not happiness necessarily, which is only one way in which we use the word. The definition of ‘content’ is:
Being satisfied with what one is or has; not wanting more or anything else.
This is exactly the attitude that we adopt when we can look at the circumstance around us and still say “My hope is in the Lord and his plan for me is unswerving.” I am not saying that is the magic cure for the circumstances to change, but I do believe that by looking to God rather than outwardly to the world, or from within ourselves, we will know what it is to trust in God and be at peace. As is God’s command to us:
Be still, and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10).
The beautiful truth about knowing God is that he can be trusted to take on our hopes and fears, whatever it is that we hold dear or that might cause us to run to Him. King David understood what it meant to be content; he did not pretend to have all the answers but he certainly knew and declared the Truth:
My heart is not proud, LORD, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have calmed and quieted myself, I am like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child I am content. Israel, put your hope in the LORD both now and forevermore. Psalm 131:1-3
Through the years, I’ve found God speaks to me through this sort of mulling exercise. He highlights certain verses, or concepts in His Word, and in my experience. I ponder. As the thoughts pile up, meld together, and soak in, I get the growing sense that He is showing me something important, but I am not exactly sure what it is.
So for a little background to my new revelation, I’m currently living away from home, spending my gap year in South Africa. I’m away from everyone that truly knows me, and there is no reputation that precedes me.
Initially I thought this was going to be great. I was so excited to have a fresh start. It wasn’t that I really had some big bad reputation I needed to get away from, but I thought it would be a good challenge to see if I could function without the direct support from my family and friends.
After being here for about three months I started to feel very, very alone. And I started to feel really inadequate. If I didn’t hear from someone back home every day I would feel forgotten and abandoned. This made me feel really weak, something I never really felt before. One of my strengths was my self-confidence, the feeling that I was strong. But once I started to feel weak I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t have anyone here who knew how I worked and how to build me up in effective ways. And I was too proud to actually ask anyone for support because I had this big misconception that if I was to be strong no one could know that I was ever weak.
All the while I knew that I was being slightly ridiculous about the situation; I knew what the bible said about community, and I knew that I wasn’t pressured to be strong all the time. But I just couldn’t believe it. Until…
I came across a verse in 2 Corinthians 12. At the beginning part of the chapter Paul is talking about boasting, and how there have been many great things that have happened and it wouldn’t be wrong for him to boast because it’s the truth. But regardless of these great things there was a thorn in his side, and even though he asked God to remove it, God’s response was “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (v.9).
And that was it. God could smooth out all the bumps in our life and make everything wonderful so we would never struggle but it just isn’t necessary. His power can be highlighted in our weakness, so why would I ever wish to be strong on my own behalf when in my weakness I can let the perfect power of God take over?!
Paul continues to say, “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (v.9-10). So I’m going to go on boasting of my weaknesses so that when feats of strength are shown all the glory can go to my God. I am weak, and there is very little I can do in my own strength, but that’s perfect! Because in this place God can demonstrate His power.
“Karri, you have an emergency call in the office. It’s your husband.”
“That’s weird” I thought to myself. He had left for a trip the night before and was to be gone two weeks. “Maybe they had car trouble?” I wondered.
Instead I learned that my 16-year-old daughter was on the way to the hospital in an ambulance.
Suddenly, there it was….PEACE…. I had clarity of mind of who to call to find out what had happened, and to make sure my other two children were taken care of.
I am directionally challenged. I prayed “Show me the right way to get to the hospital.” I hit all green lights on the way, as I drove, and even though I missed one exit, I was reminded of another route to take. The whole time covered with PEACE.
John 14:27 – 28 “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.”
Through everything (her surgery, the recovery, the fact that my husband couldn’t be with us), His peace stayed, my heart and mind were guarded against fear, worry, and anxiety.
After we were home, I was convicted of my thoughts about peace and how and when I asked for it. For example, I knew that God would give me the peace and strength to get through this. This was a “big moment” and I expected God to show up. So why don’t I ask and use that same peace when my job, my laundry and/or the kids are feeling overwhelming? What I realized is it came down to pride. I believed I can and should do all those things by myself, but God wants to be a part of everything and every part of our lives.
Philippians 4:7 “And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:7 doesn’t say … and the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension in big moments… It states the peace of God will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. This peace is available at any moment, in any circumstance, to anyone. The reason I didn’t experience it in the “little things” was because of me. I chose to limit God’s peace, to tell Him when and where I could use it. I will not make that choice again.
I am excited to use this new wisdom, this new choice and see God work His peace in ALL areas of my life, (including the laundry!!!)
Tell me if you can relate: over the last several weeks we have been busy. And not just our normal busy…it feels like we have been “red-lining.” Travel, meetings, late nights, a heavy workload, mission trip preparation. Add to that PMS and a lack of sleep and all of a sudden my husband found his joyful, capable wife transformed into a stress-out, sharp-tongued drama queen. Enter marital stress. Ahhh! Where does it end?
Psalm 3:3
But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head.
YOU, O Lord, are the LIFTER of my head! By his grace he lifted my head. Above the fray, below the noise, whichever expression you want to use: he pulled me out of the chaos and corrected my perspective.
Psalm 121:1-2
I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
I’m learning the power of stillness. It’s easy to say, much harder to do.
It is amazing to me how many things there are to do in a day, even when I’m not busy! After all, I no longer have young children underfoot and I am not currently working outside the home. Yet I still have cleaning, cooking, Bible reading, grocery shopping, contacting friends and loved ones, studying, driving the kids to school, and extra-curricular events, praying, laundry, etc. Even when I’m not physically doing something, my mind is actively planning, organizing, remembering, pondering, and on and on.
I know that we need to clean our houses, evaluate our actions, mull over events from our past, and even make plans for the future, from time to time. But oftentimes, I think we sincerely, and unknowingly, try to do God’s job for Him. We earnestly try to figure it all out. Why did this happen? What if I hadn’t gone there? Was I wrong when I…? What can I do now? Where should I go next? How can this be fixed?
Be still, my soul, be still.
O Lord, my heart is not lifted up; my eyes are not raised too high; I do not occupy myself with things too great and too marvelous for me. But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me. Psalm 131:1-2
Maybe, as these verses suggest, embracing our humble position before the Lord, leaving things to Him, for Him to figure out, in His own way, without our suggestions on the most advantageous way to solve a sticky situation, or the best way to move us forward, is an indication that we are growing up. Or maybe calming and quieting our souls helps us grow up in Him. Maybe both are true.
Andrew Murray says in Waiting On God, that being still before the Lord means “having our thoughts and wishes, our fears and hopes, hushed into calm and quiet…” As with so many things in life that matter, this comes with purposeful action. I have to willfully quiet my soul before my God. It will not just happen. Being still before the Lord takes discipline.
Discipline to prioritize time in my busy day to be still. (Even just 5-15 minutes.) Discipline to remove distractions. (Turn off the television or any noise producer. Find a comfortable spot. Maybe make a list of tasks I have yet to do in the day to get them off my mind.) Discipline to set my heart on the Lord. (Read some Psalms. Listen to worshipful music.)
But the real discipline comes when I actually begin to be still before the Lord. It is astounding how many places my mind tries to take me! I say no to the spill I’ve just remembered I didn’t wipe up in the kitchen, and no to the urge to send a quick reply to that email, and no to the fear that tauntingly whispers, “You are just sitting alone here.” It even means tabling the almost reflexive petitions, “I want,” “I need,” or “Help me, Lord!” for another time. Hush.
Be still, my soul, be still.
I focus on HIM. Breathe Him in. I stick with it. I remind myself to not seek an outcome, or an experience, just Jesus. I enjoy being with Him, like you savor just being with someone you deeply love. No agenda. No expectation, except that He is here.
Rest saturates the mind and presses into the soul.
Still waters run deep.
When we are still before the Lord–“hushed into calm and quiet”–His presence, His glory, His light, His love, touches us in a very deep, profound, often inexplicable, and unrepeatable way. As Murray puts it, being still “… lets God be God.”
I certainly have not plumbed the depths of stillness, but touching it whets my appetite for more of Him.
Enjoy this beautiful song by Kari Jobe, if you can spare a couple of minutes. Let stillness reach into your heart and blanket your soul with His presence.
