Category Archives: Alli Sullivan

Identity

Posted on November 16, 2011 by Lanie| 5 Comments

By Alli Sullivan

In telling my discoveries I first want to talk a bit about a retreat I just went on. My youth group (ages 13 through 30-something) goes on this retreat each year focusing on the Spirit and letting Him do work in us to prepare for the upcoming year. It’s a beautiful thing. Every year.

This year we started our Saturday by taking a spiritual gifting test. I had never taken a test like this before and I was skeptical…and, honestly, slightly worried that I would be disappointed with the results. I always feel like I already know who I am, and I’m not that excited about it; I have this idea that I am someone who is loud, full of joy, confident and therefore I’m a leader, almost by default. I’m happy to fill those shoes, leading comes naturally to me and I love people! It’s the role I’ve always played in the church and it’s a wonderful thing!

We took the test and leadership was not even in my top five! I was kind of excited and a little bit concerned but more than anything I felt a big unexpected relief. Not to say that this test was the be all and end all to what I’m called to do but I didn’t see it coming that there were other roles that I could fill; I’ve just always been a leader. But this test opened my eyes to see that there was something that came even more naturally through who God made me to be. It wasn’t something that came naturally through continued expectations (even one’s put on myself) and familiarity, but it was something that came from my heart. It was so clear to me that this other gift, which turned out to be intercession, is a role that I am better suited to fill because of my true identity created by Christ.

The same sort of thing happened to Simon Peter, eh? Simon Peter? He’s just one of the twelve, right? He’s the guy who wavered as he stepped on the water, and denied Jesus, he’s just a regular guy trying his best…but here’s the thing about this guy: God had big plans for him. Regardless of all the ideas Peter had of himself, or what others’ perceptions of him were, God designed Peter for a purpose and planted it in his heart. This purpose was there from the beginning and God could see it in his heart. So Jesus called it out! Imagine being in that situation. Standing with your friends and Jesus saying,

“So I tell you, you are Peter. On this rock I will build my church, and the power of death will not be able to defeat it.”
(Matt 16:18)

…wow! I can only imagine the disciples were shocked and didn’t really know how to treat Peter after that had been said. Peter may have wished he could sink back into what he was more comfortable being but this is what God had for Peter. But that doesn’t matter, God looked into Peter’s heart and saw his true identity and declared over his life that he was called to big things. That’s the Peter God wants and the role Peter is designed to fill in the Body.

It is very satisfying to embrace the role God has for us! This identity rooted in who God has created me to be makes more sense than the way I had always perceived myself. It just feels right; it’s like setting down the puzzle piece that really belongs in the puzzle, not the counterfeit piece that leaves gaps.  It’s the real deal and it’s satisfying!

And although it was a relief to discover I wasn’t confined by the role of leadership, it’s great to know that other people are strongest in leadership and that’s where they fit best! A friend of mine said she was thinking while she was taking the test that it would be great to be strong in all of the areas and wouldn’t she love to know someone who has every strength…but she does! It’s the Bride of Christ! The Bride of Christ has it all, which is why it is crucial that we know what role we have individually to avoid being in the awkward position of forcing ourselves into an empty space in a puzzle that we almost fit into, or that we could fill. We must do what we’re called to do, and we have to let God define it for us. Why? Because He knows the bigger picture; He knows our hearts through and through and knows exactly where he needs us to fill our place in His Bride.

 

“I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you…his incomparably great power for us who believe… God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”

                                Ephesians 1:18-23

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The Great Divorce Chapters 5 & 6

Posted on October 17, 2011 by Lanie| 4 Comments

By Alli Sullivan

The Great Divorce: Chapters 5 & 6

The more and more I read this book, the more I’m amazed at what good insight C.S. Lewis has on the nature of humans.

Chapter 5 begins with the meeting of two old friends, who, it seems, studied together in college and were well known for stating bold opinions. However, from what the Bright Person, Dick, has to say it seems that through their time of moderate fame, they were bypassing the truth they found and using their intellect only to benefit themselves.

From this chapter I gathered three main thoughts that were emphasized:

  1. Sins of intellect
  2. Heaven
  3. Freedom (this idea is somewhat carried into chapter six).

1. Sins of intellect

This is a topic that I haven’t given much thought to previously but the way the Bright Person puts it makes me think how easy it is to slip into this sin.

“Having allowed oneself to drift unresisting, unpraying, accepting every half-conscious solicitation from our desires, we reached a point where we no longer believed the Faith. Just in the same way a jealous man, drifting and unresisting, reaches a point at which he believes lies about his best friend…these beliefs are sincere in the sense that they do occur as psychological events in the man’s mind. If that’s what you mean by sincerity they are sincere and so are ours. But errors which are sincere in that sense are not innocent”  (p. 41).

Errors are errors and there is no room for arguing that, but so often our mind can deceive us into thinking we are not at fault for believing something just because it was an honest belief.  We are responsible for our thoughts and that is the bottom line. Our ‘beliefs’ should never become more of a focus than the foundation of the belief, which is our faith in God.

So, what does that mean for us as Christians? What’s sincere and what’s not? Are we responsible for our thoughts?

2. Heaven (for God’s pleasure)

When presented with the opportunity to go to the mountain, the ghost has many conditions under which he would be willing to go but the Bright person says to him,

“I can promise you none of these thing. No sphere of usefulness: you are not needed there at all. No scope for your talents: only forgiveness for having perverted them. No atmosphere of inquiry, for I will bring you to a land not of questions but of answers, and you shall see the face of God” (p. 43).

It’s amazing that we are even offered to go to this wonderful place because God doesn’t need us there at all. There is no benefit to God to have us with him apart from that He loves and enjoys His creation so much! I love that about God; He gives us responsibilities and holds us accountable but if we relinquish control of our lives to Him He will lead us to glorious places regardless of our failures.

Why do we go to Heaven, then? Why does God even want us there?

3. Freedom

This whole chapter is loaded! But I think the Bright person makes a great point about the freedom we have when we’re in God. He says that we are free but we are

“free as a man is free to drink while he is drinking. He is not free still to be dry” (p. 49).

What does everyone think of this statement? Does it mean that our only choice is to cease drinking? Or does it mean that, in God, we are only free to choose goodness and no longer have the freedom to be without?

In  chapter six, a man is trying to carry with him an apple from Heaven down to Hell, which cannot be done. The things of God do not fit into an evil place, just as a round peg doesn’t fit into a square hole. Often times I find myself in this situation—I want the things of God but I don’t want to leave behind the place where I was.

Although there are limitations on where the fruit can be carried, the offer to eat them is available. God says to us:

“stay here and learn to eat such apples. The very leaves and the blades of grass in the wood will delight to teach you” (p. 52).

What else could this man symbolize? What other attributes of God are revealed by him calling out to this man?

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Thoughts on Salt

Posted on September 20, 2011 by Abby| 4 Comments

By Alli Sullivan

I’ve recently been thinking about what we as Christians are called to do. In my time of thinking I’ve been in many conversations with both Christians and non-Christians and everyone seems to be calling out for the same thing; that Christians would actually be Christians–in terms of doing what the bible teaches us to do (being salt and light, showing genuine love, etc).

I’ve been trying to figure out what it means or looks like for Christians to embody the vision laid out for us in the Bible. It’s awesome to read what the New Testament and discover the awesome calling God has for us as His people. Amazing, amazing! There is SUCH a need for the Church to rise up and be the salt and light of the earth. It is literally crucial for any kind of success at all in the world. Isn’t it awesome to be a part of something this important?!

I’ve also been paging through a book by Dietrich Bonhoeffer recently called The Cost of Discipleship, and there is a chapter where he discusses the importance of visible community (which was an appropriate chapter to stumble upon, eh? Don’t you love it when that happens?!) This chapter illustrates just how vital it is for believers to be the salt of the earth. He starts by saying that disciples previously thought that the blessed ones were only fit to live in heaven but Jesus says that we are to be the salt of the earth – that we are needed here! Salt at that time was incomparable in its worth – it was so necessary to avoid sickness and disease, and that is what Christians are meant to be in this world – completely crucial to life.

And the really, really exciting part is that Jesus tells us, “ye are the salt of the world.” He does not say “ye must be the salt of the world.” It’s a done deal! We are the salt… we’re crucial to life. Bonhoeffer puts it this way “It is not for the disciple to decide whether they will be the salt of the earth, for they are whether they like it or not, they have been made salt by the call they have received.” Just by answering that call we enter into an identity that is of utmost value to society.

However, the most vital part of this calling is the complete acceptance of it. As Christians we need to embrace what we are, really be it, and take back our God-given roles in being essential to the community. I’m really excited that we are the salt!

Photo Credit: Betsy McIntyre, http://www.luckypennyphoto.com/

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Wrapping it up, tying the bow…

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Abby| 4 Comments

By Alli Sullivan

Home sweet home…I am sitting now on the cold tile floor of my parent’s basement smack dab in the middle of Minnesota’s hot, hot summer. It is good to be back. And it’s been really fun to talk with people about what I’ve been up to – and all the conversations have led me to being able to put the whole trip into a nice little package with a beautiful bow!

Throughout my time in South Africa I worked at a pre-primary school, a center for children with disabilities, a high school and an orphanage.

I spent the most amount of time working with the pre-primary school (5 hours a week) because it was it was on the Bizweni campus, where I was living and also because the lady I worked with was in charge of a class of 13 three-year olds every day and was so incredibly grateful for any help! The children were so precious, and the diversity was incredible–most of the children already knew two languages and some even knew three! And although children are children and some days they just decide to be naughty, each time I arrived they all yelled my name and came running for hugs. The love was ALWAYS appreciated. I just love how this picture depicts the children like a flock of sheep eagerly waiting to move out of the pen, that’s totally how they are and it’s a beautiful thing. Which reminds me of Luke 12:32, “Do not fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom”. And just as I loved to be loved by this little flock and shower them back with affection it is the same with God! And in return He is pleased to give us the kingdom! Hallelujah!

 

I also worked with children who had various disabilities at a different on the Bizweni Campus. These kids were equally as amazing to spend time with and the simplicity of their love was inspiring. These children knew how to make anything into a fun time, and even just sitting with them and clapping hands brought such joy. So often I try to complicate things and add bells and whistles to my ideas to make them sound more appealing…but really the more simple the more sustainable. And that was one of the main realizations I had while being away. The things God asks of us are fairly clear-cut (i.e., 1 Thess 5:16-18, Matt 22:37-40) but what it takes to accomplish these tasks is complete devotion. So keeping this in mind it’s entirely unwise to complicate what God asks of us, because it takes 100% commitment to focus on the core commandments. It leaves no room for successful additions to what God is asking of us; which is brilliant!

I really enjoyed the opportunity to get involved with some very lively high school girls! Although transportation hindered us from spending more time with them, they welcomed me into their lives nonetheless. This state school (Hottentots Holland High School…great name, eh?) had a program called JIK (Jesus is King in English and Jesus is Koning in Afrikaans) where students sign up for an hour every other week to hear about God and meet in small groups and discuss theology! It blew my mind that the district would support such a program, it was amazing! Over half of the students signed up and I was able to lead two small groups during my time. It’s amazing that there is an allotted time for seeking God worked right into their school day and He is doing big things with that! Very exciting!

The boys (aged 9-17) that I hung out with at the orphanage are the people who I think about most often after arriving home, because it was so normal to talk with them and play soccer and just chill. They are just normal kids doing normal kid things…but because of their circumstances their futures’ appear to be pretty bleak. There is talk of making some education available for them and I am really excited to see where this talk leads, because the boys so genuinely deserve a better future.

In a song by the band mewithoutYou  (C-Minor) there is a line that says, “Open my door, my Lord, to whatever makes me love You more.” And when all is said and done my South Africa experience was an open door leading to loving God more. I can honestly say that I do indeed love God more. And that is the first and greatest command.

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The Simple Will of God

Posted on July 4, 2011 by Abby| 3 Comments

By Alli Sullivan

Yes, simple.

I’m just about to leave South Africa and I still have no clue what lies ahead. But the thing is, the more people I talk to the more I realize no one knows what lies ahead! Even my parents, who have been working their jobs for many years, are uncertain what the complete will of God is for their lives. But take heart! Because God has actually told us his will is for our lives.

“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing and give thanks in all circumstances; this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” 1 Thess 5:16-18

I came across this verse and had to laugh because of how well God knows me; He couldn’t have been more clear. This is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you… After reading this I was thinking this seems pretty doable! And the amazing thing was that the following couple of weeks after this realization that the will of God isn’t out of reach in the slightest, I was filled with such joy that even when I wanted to be upset at something I just couldn’t! It was like God had placed me in the heart of His will which is to “rejoice always” and I was no longer able to not rejoice!

It has been an amazing time of healing and resting. God is so faithful that when we are seeking we will find. Don’t get me wrong, in my time of seeking,  I’ve still been trying to sort out what to do in terms of jobs and schooling and again I had to laugh because I am constantly trying to find a way to justify my perception of God’s will.  I’ve always thought that His will is going to be some sort of works. But…

Then they said to him, “What must we do to do the works of God?” Jesus answered, ‘The work of God is this: to believe in the One He has sent’” (John 6:28-29).

So basically it’s impossible to get around what God wants from us. He wants us to dwell with him and be filled with joy! All he requires of us is to believe! It really is that simple. I mean, if you think of it, His greatest commandment is to love! He calls us to a life worth living…and it is that simple.

 

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Created In God’s Image

Posted on June 1, 2011 by Abby| 2 Comments

By Alli Sullivan

My hair gets rather poofy these days and I thought it might be time to trim it up. Easier said than done when you’re in a foreign country with no transportation. So I figured I would just do it myself. I scrounged through the kitchen drawers and found a pair of children’s safety scissors. Perfect!

I wet my hair, brushed it out, sectioned it off and started trying to pull the hair straight out between my two fingers like the hair dresser always does so easily. But… oh boy! It was so much more difficult than I thought! It was nearly impossible to pull the chunks from the back forward to see what was going on. And the mirrored reflection I was working with kept messing with my depth perception. Mirrors are meant to be such a perfect reflection but their view is so limited! Eventually I just blindly pulled chunks in the back and based my cutting on what I could feel.

It actually turned out pretty decent from what I can tell, but the whole process made me think a little bit about reflections. The reflection I was getting from the mirror while trying to cut my hair was so frustrating! I couldn’t figure out how to get a view of the whole picture. I never was able to see the back of my head and everything looked backwards. It would have been much easier if I had a mannequin or some sort of representation of myself to look at. Is a reflection all that it’s cracked up to be?

reflection |riˈflek sh ən|
noun
the throwing back by a body or surface of light, heat, or sound without absorbing it

I’m not sure if I want to be a reflection…I want to absorb God. I want to be saturated with God’s character so that it is no longer me but only God. That not only am I doing what He is doing but that He is the one doing it–I’m just the empty glove with His hand inside. We were created in His image not so that we could give a limited, inverse view of Him, but we were created to represent His heart on this earth. We were made in His likeness (Gen. 1:26), and that is all it’s cracked up to be!

likeness |ˈlīknis|
noun
the fact or quality of being alike; resemblance; outward appearance of; representation

That’s what I want! I want to have the appearance of Him, I want to be His representation. Not just a surface reflection but to act in his behalf as a representative! And that’s how we were created. We are more than a reflection!

“It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me…” (Gal 2:20).

It’s not us reflecting God – it’s God existing through us. We are His image!

So when I’m trying to comprehend this and thinking about how to reflect God I get so frustrated because I can’t “reflect” the whole 360 degree image of Him. On my own strength I’m just a small wall mirror at best. The great news is that it’s no longer I who live! That verse in Galatians continues to say that “…the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” The life that I now live is focused only on my faith in the One who promised me a life in His image.

If you would like a reminder of what God’s “mirror” shows us about ourselves, click to download our free Who I Am In Christ resource.

Every Wednesday we’ll be considering a practice related to our body, soul or spirit to help us completely devote ourselves to Jesus.

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Being Weak

Posted on May 10, 2011 by Abby| 9 Comments

By Alli Sullivan

So for a little background to my new revelation, I’m currently living away from home, spending my gap year in South Africa. I’m away from everyone that truly knows me, and there is no reputation that precedes me.

Initially I thought this was going to be great. I was so excited to have a fresh start. It wasn’t that I really had some big bad reputation I needed to get away from, but I thought it would be a good challenge to see if I could function without the direct support from my family and friends.

After being here for about three months I started to feel very, very alone. And I started to feel really inadequate. If I didn’t hear from someone back home every day I would feel forgotten and abandoned. This made me feel really weak, something I never really felt before. One of my strengths was my self-confidence, the feeling that I was strong. But once I started to feel weak I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t have anyone here who knew how I worked and how to build me up in effective ways. And I was too proud to actually ask anyone for support because I had this big misconception that if I was to be strong no one could know that I was ever weak.

All the while I knew that I was being slightly ridiculous about the situation; I knew what the bible said about community, and I knew that I wasn’t pressured to be strong all the time. But I just couldn’t believe it. Until…

I came across a verse in 2 Corinthians 12. At the beginning part of the chapter Paul is talking about boasting, and how there have been many great things that have happened and it wouldn’t be wrong for him to boast because it’s the truth. But regardless of these great things there was a thorn in his side, and even though he asked God to remove it, God’s response was “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (v.9).

And that was it. God could smooth out all the bumps in our life and make everything wonderful so we would never struggle but it just isn’t necessary. His power can be highlighted in our weakness, so why would I ever wish to be strong on my own behalf when in my weakness I can let the perfect power of God take over?!

Paul continues to say, “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (v.9-10). So I’m going to go on boasting of my weaknesses so that when feats of strength are shown all the glory can go to my God. I am weak, and there is very little I can do in my own strength, but that’s perfect! Because in this place God can demonstrate His power.

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